Perhaps I'm Napoleon

Ah, the ball gag.

Gagging is something that I said I would never ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever do.

When Jenn started trying to pervert me from plain old vanilla into butterscoth ripple, she gave me a list of activities that she got off of some website. It was a very long list of things associated with BDSM. Next to each item were checkboxes. The checkboxes said things like 'Have already tried', 'Am curious about', 'Don't like the thought of', 'Don't know what this is', and so on.

I was embarrassed at first because I checked the 'Don't know what this is' box the most often.

When two people, who are planning to do BDSM play together, talk about what they're into and what they might want to do with each other, it's called 'Negotiating'. In the beginning, most of the 'negotiating' between Jenn and I was her telling me just what the heck was involved in all of the activities on the list.

So, as I learned what each thing was, I was able to change my answers from 'Don't know what this is' to other answers, such as 'Am curious about' and so forth. But there were many things that I checked 'Don't have any interest at all' or 'Is completely off limits'.

Gagging was one of the things that was completely off limits, but now, like some other things on the list, I enjoy doing it. I enjoy gagging Jenn and I enjoy being gagged as well. It makes me feel very subby. I think one of the reasons that I was opposed to it at first is because it seemed dangerous to me. Of course, there's a reason it seemed dangerous; it is dangerous!

Now, to be a responsible pervert, let me give you some advice. If you ever do any kind of play that involves gagging, even if it's a very light gag that the person can still talk through, you MUST set up a visual safeword so that your partner can tell you when they are in trouble.

You MUST! You MUST! You MUST! You MUST!

If you don't, I will bend you over your desk and spank you firmly! I may do that anyways, just for the fun of it.

Seriously though, gagging is dangerous. Things can go bad very quickly, and your partner really needs to be able to communicate with you. So please, for me, use use visual safewords.

BAD Visual Safewords: Eye contact, hand gestures, going limp/going stiff. These visual safewords SUCK! They are vague and easily missed.

GOOD Visual Safewords: Give the person who is gagged something to hold, something like a metal ladle or spatula, not plastic or rubber, metal. You want something that will catch your eye, and something that will make some noise when dropped. If the person who is gagged drops the ladle/spatula, you will see it and hear it and know that she/he is in trouble and that you need to take the gag off immediately.

OK, sorry for all the SHOUTING, but BDSM safety is something that I feel strongly about. I know that I'm projecting my own fears and insecurities onto you, but I don't plan to feel guilty about it.

So, now I'm definitely not vanilla anymore. I think I've even moved past being butterscotch ripple (mostly vanilla), and into full-blown .....

Is there an icecream flavour that's kinky?

Sorry, my metaphor seems to have fallen apart on me. I hate it when that happens.

Don't forget to check out the free samples at my website.

*kisses*

Veronica